25 Comments
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Michela Palmer's avatar

Kelly I love love loved this, and took a screenshot of Poem #4, it made me tear up! Rooting for you and excited to see where 2026 goes :)

kelly johnson's avatar

Thank you! ☺️

Lindsey Kontovich's avatar

These poems you created are beautiful. Sending love and patience and an agent and a book deal to you. 🩷

Cait's avatar

I think pursuing a wholesome dream in 2025 is an insane way to live. There are so few soft spaces to land. But I also think it's the only way to make it out with our souls still intact. Having your hopes dashed isn't fun, but can you even imagine the joy you'll feel once you make it to the next stage? I can't wait to see the essay you publish when you get a book through this arduous process. I am rooting for you!

kelly johnson's avatar

Thanks Cait!!

Georgette's avatar

Thank you for sharing the “rawness” of your feelings in this process. I am not a writer and this was eye opening for me to understand the process that results in a book I select to purchase and read. Your description of your experience in the London bookstore and your ultimate book selection made me tear up as it’s everything that has happened to you with each query submission. DON’T give up, it will come and as you said…it’s timing. Wishing you the strength and faith to keep pursuing your dream.

kelly johnson's avatar

Thank you so much ❤️❤️

Taylor's avatar

I feel like these poems need to be their own book! It reminds me a lot of Japanese kintsugi

“Japanese art of repairing broken pottery by mending the fractured pieces with lacquer mixed with powdered gold, silver, or platinum, highlighting the breaks as part of the object's history rather than hiding them, embodying a philosophy of embracing imperfection, resilience, and beauty in flaws 🖤”

kelly johnson's avatar

That is absolutely perfect!

Maguire Burgess's avatar

As someone in the process of finishing their first novel, the angst of solidarity I feel for you!!!!

kelly johnson's avatar

UGH IT'S SO HARD KEEP GOING!!!!!!! xx

Kat Spada's avatar

Needed to read this. I've found writing book 2 while getting rejections on book 1 to make the writing SO much harder.

kelly johnson's avatar

UGHHHHHHH I'm sorry. The rejections on book 1 hit hard don't they

Catherine's avatar

As a writer not yet at the querying stage, I so so appreciate your insight into the process as it's happening and your honest feelings about how much it fucking sucks. If you're looking for any resources, Chelsea Hodson offers one-on-one literary agent meetings every couple of months through her Morning Writing Club. You can book a 15 minute slot with an agent and submit your query letter ahead of time for feedback (although you don't have to, you can talk about anything). This is not an ad btw - I'm just a MWC member who thought of that offering when I read your post! https://www.patreon.com/c/chelseahodson/posts

Esther's avatar

Rejection is so so so hard, and you have buckets of my respect and admiration for your tenacity. Also echoing another comment that Poem #4 made me stop in my tracks! Sending positive vibes for your writing journey in 2026.

kelly johnson's avatar

Thank you so much! 🥲

Daci Jaye's avatar

#4 and #7 🥹 Loved this. I really feel like 2026 is your year.

kelly johnson's avatar

Thank you ❤️❤️❤️

Annie Berdick's avatar

These poems are beautiful Kelly!

kelly johnson's avatar

Thank you, Annie! x

Kirsten Liedl's avatar

I am in a very similar place - challenging query journey on my first novel, and partway through editing my second (dreading the querying part). I feel much less alone! If you ever want an extra beta reader, let me know!

kelly johnson's avatar

Wishing you luck, timing, and all the good vibes!!!!! ❤️

Joelle's avatar

Thank you so much for sharing this journey. As someone who has been working on her own first novel for the last few years — yet to query because I have not felt what I have is perfect enough (I guess? Like that even is possible to achieve) — I appreciate seeing a real perspective that isn’t the super shiny version I always see on socials from authors or aspiring authors, where it feels like they wrote their book in a couple months and then an agent magically found them immediately with little effort on their part. Thanks for keeping it real.

kelly johnson's avatar

Perfection will absolutely drive you mad. Wishing you all the good vibes on your writing journey ❤️❤️❤️❤️