Hey! This issue covers Chapter 4 of the Ruby Warrington Winter Slow Read—a 10 week journey through the book Women Without Kids. New episodes drop every Sunday from February to early April. If you want to start at the beginning or read more about what we’re doing here, head on over to the Introduction. The first 15(ish) minutes of each episode are free to listen to!
Welcome back! ⚡️ Chapter 4: Sexual Evolution is the one chapter in this book that no one else was brave enough to volunteer for, LOL. That’s because today we are talking about women’s bodies and sexuality (gasp) and, well, the way that babies are made (or not made), as well as some interesting thoughts about the connection between fertility and the environment. My fearless guest for today is Sophie, who is here representing Canada! 🪩 I think we maybe laughed the most in this chapter out of the entire book, pretty sure!!
✨ Introducing today’s guest—
Sophie (36, Scorpio, proud childless cat lady) is an art historian and museum professional. In her spare time, she likes to devour the latest bestseller for one of her multiple book clubs and is perpetually in the midst of planning her next trip. She met the love of her life while she was getting her master's degree in London, and they eventually decided to move back to her hometown to see whether being closer to family would sway them into becoming parents. She assumed that she would become a mother eventually, but so far remains unconvinced. She currently lives in Toronto with her husband and their two naughty cats.
Historically, it has been biological women who have borne the consequences of sex (pg. 85)
“If the twentieth century saw the unfolding of the sexual revolution, then in the 2020s the time is ripe for sexual evolution—that is, a total reimagining of our sexual selves, and a mass departure from the overarching narrative that has defined human sexuality to date. Symbolically speaking, by revoking the biological imperative to procreate, women without kids are the walking, talking embodiment of this; “proof” that women’s bodies and sexuality are not inextricable from the procreative project. And as long as we are seen as deviant and “unnatural,” and as long as women who can’t get pregnant are deemed as having “failed,” we will know there is still work to be done.
After all, historically it has been biological women who have (literally and unfairly) borne the consequences of sex. It is women who become pregnant; women who gestate the developing fetus; women whose bodies are split in two by the agony of childbirth; and (even in the most progressive families) women who must put everything else on pause in order to nurture the infant after it is born. As such, the advent of more effective birth control and legalized abortion could be framed as part of the free-love and sex-positivity movements, and as much a part of the push for gender equality in the realm of child-rearing as they are about the liberation of desire.”—Ruby Warrington
Timestamps:
0:45 — Introducing Sophie, who read the book a few years ago when it came out
3:30 — Reading today’s excerpt (pg. 85) and how I (and we) so rarely talk about sex, which is actually weird???
10:30 — Having sex for pleasure, sex ed, and separating sex and procreation
16:15 — Have either of us had an ex who tried to get us pregnant? 👀 (and the inherent power imbalance of being young and dating an older man)
21:50 — How Gen Z is having less sex than any other generation before them
24:00 — Biological imperatives, the repeal of Roe v. Wade, and what does “natural” even mean anymore
30:00 — Falling fertility rates as a result of stress, microplastics, and consumerism, plus some thoughts on environmentalism and over/underpopulation (come hear me shit on Elon Musk)
39:45 — Women’s bodies as public property (pg. 91)
45:30 — A comparison of the words “cunt” and “fuck” (pg. 87) and some final thoughts about the importance of language
P.S. As always, if you are extremely passionate about all of this and want to chat 1:1, check out my PHONE A FRIEND sessions :) Use code “RUBY” for 20% off from now until April 30th.
